Blonda si bruneta..

O bruneta si o blonda discutau: Bruneta: Ia uite draga cu ce vine prietenul meu acum… Blonda:
– Mama ce masina…Si ce flori are in brate…
Bruneta:
– Offff…iar o sa ma puna sa stau cu picioaele desfacute toata noaptea!
Blonda:
– De ce draga? N-aveti vaza?

A blonde at the grocery store:

– I would like 4 tomatoes, 4 potatoes and 4 onions
– I can help you with the tomatoes and the potatoes, but not with the onions…
– Ok… than I’ll have 2 tomatoes, 2 potatoes and 2 onions
– I see you don’t understand me: I have tomatoes, I have potatoes, but I have no onions
– I see… than I’ll have a tomato, a potato and an onion
– Ok, let’s do this the other way around. If you take the “mato” out of the “tomato”, what do you have?
– Aaaa… “to”?
– Right, and if you take the “tato” out of the “potato”, what do you have?
– Aaaa… “po”?
– Excellent, and if you take the “fuck” out of the “onion”, what do you have?
– Aaaa… aaa… but there is no “fuck” in “onion”
– Exactly, there is no fuckin’ onion!

Doua blonde calatoresc cu trenul

Doua blonde calatoresc cu trenul. In compartiment cu ele calatoreste un barbat în vârsta si cu barba. Una dintre ele ii sopteste celeilalte:
– Uita-te! Asta-i Mircea cel Batrân…
– Ce proasta esti. Ala e mort de vreo 5 – 600 de ani.
In acel moment un alt barbat intra in compartiment, si-l saluta pe barbos:
– Salut Mircea, ce faci, batrane! nu te-am mai vazut de sute de ani.
Prima blonda:
– Na fa, cine-i proasta?